When The Cat's Away...

The mouse... hrmm, I dunno what the mouse does when the cat's away because he's never left before! Seriously. Since we decided to start dating and "see what happens" some fifteen years ago, the cat, aka hubby, has never been away from us. We have been away from him. The kids have both gone to sleep over with friends on several occasions and I've had numerous business trips as well as two short vacations away from them all. But, not hubby. He is the quintessential homebody.

Sadly, his Nana passed away unexpectedly the other day. Since she died without having seen a doctor in the previous two weeks, an inquest had to be held which meant that the earliest possible date for the funeral was this coming Monday. He couldn't not go. Having just started this job, I couldn't bring myself to ask for time off...

He spent most of last week obsessing about the trip. The rest of our life took a backseat as he shopped for new clothes, exchanged some euro for sterling, packed and repacked and talked endlessly about how hard it was going to be for him to be away from us. It started out being sweet. Then it was funny. By the time he left this morning I was exasperated and thisclose to suggesting he extend his trip. Don't go away mad, just go away!

It's been ten hours since he left. In that time, I've had at least a dozen text messages and a phone call from him. I love that we are so close and I do appreciate all that he does for us, but I think it's important for everybody to have a little time away. Sometimes I feel a little smothered.

Most women I know complain because their husbands are too distant and never spend any time with them. I don't complain (except of course, to you). Regardless, several women have taken it upon themselves to explain to me just how wonderful he is and have warned me that there's a line forming of willing takers should anything happen. I'm always careful to acknowledge that he's pretty amazing but that he's not alone in this marriage - I must be doing something right.

But I also think that too much of a good thing creates its own set of issues and being smothered is just as hard as being neglected. I dunno, maybe I'm talking out of my arse... What do you think?